“Feeling like we are not good enough, means that we are not good enough compared to a fictitious image of perfection in our mind. Nothing more.” – anonymous
Why is it that many women and girls are insecure today?
Are we really a narcissistic generation? Obsessed with our outer appearance versus what’s inside or have we been made to feel not good enough by the media and European models of beauty? Do you find yourself looking to social media and technology to give you a sense of importance, worth or to validate who you are as a woman (or girl)?
Many of the young women I know have gone along with the created illusion of how we are supposed to look and what we should wear to get “our guy’s” attention. Big butt, small waist, booty shorts, etc.
The sex appeal trap.
If you don’t match what society says is appealing or attractive, you can began to feel not good enough, but God’s view of you and the beauty that you possess is totally different than the world’s standard of appeal.
“Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” ~Proverbs 31:10 KJV
If you were never told you were beautiful (as you are) by your father or father figure you look for the feeling of beauty from a man. However, God being our Ultimate Parent urges us to come to Him for understanding and truth about who we are because God’s love is everlasting and unconditional.
God’s love doesn’t make us feel like we’ll never match up.
“The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.” ~Jeremiah 31:3 NIV
If you compare yourself to other women, the negative emotions of insecurity will pop up within you. It’s starts in your head, but is carried around in your heart and comes across in your actions. Joyce Meyer’s article, How to Find Freedom From Insecurity touches on how you can begin to overcome insecurity or feeling not good enough. Click here to read it.
Ultimately, it’s important to do the work to change how we feel emotionally about ourselves.
Instead of fearing we are incomplete or don’t measure up, God wants to assure us that we are complete (whole) in God and as God’s creation, we serve a divine purpose. The only caveat is you have to spend time with God to get to know how fearfully and wonderfully made you are.
“How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered!” ~Psalm 139:17
Growing up, I was on the thicker side of the scale and everyone else was skinner than me. I would cry because I thought I was fat, I even starved myself to see if that would help me lose weight. My family always told me I was beautiful and squeezed my “chubby” cheeks. I was always photogenic, smiling and pretended to be unashamed to the world, but on the inside, I couldn’t stand the look of me.
I wanted to change everything.
It wasn’t until I gained internal confidence and a true sense that I am good enough that I was able to portray on the outside, how I was beginning to feel about myself on the inside. I stopped looking to others for assurance and began to look to God.
It’s clearer to me now: God made me unique in my own way.
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” ~Psalm 139:14 NIV
I believe Psalm 139:14 more today.
What does all of this mean? First. The world is not the best resource to look to for assurance and confirmation on your image, worth or value. Second. Your thoughts about you can be suspect too, depending on your emotions, how your were raised, and if you were affirmed or not. Lastly. God is the ultimate knower of who you are and what you were divinely shaped to offer to this world. Therefore, getting engaged with God for self-understanding is where you’ll win every time!
Has this article helped you to rethink God’s role in how you see you? How is insecurity impacting your life? We’d love to hear from you! Please comment below and if you enjoyed this article, take a few seconds to share it.
Zybrea Knight, Intern | Content Developer (edits by Tiffany Wilson, M.Div)
P.S. If you struggle with perfectionism or a heavy sense of pressure that you are not good enough, I urge you to join us for this Spring’s installment of the Inner Circle! Beginning April 30th, the Inner Circle virtual community will be focused on getting to know the infamous Proverbs 31 woman. What can we learn from her? We’ll also review how to hear from God for yourself? Plus, how to walk less in fear and more in the boldness of who God has created you to be.
Don’t miss this opportunity! Early Bird Registration ends April 16 @ 11:59pm. CLICK HERE for details.