Why Most New Year’s Resolutions Fail

Yes! Another New Year’s Day is upon us, new focus, new mindset, new resolution for 2016 right or nah?

This may sound anti Happy New Year! –but every New Year doesn’t have to be about adding something “new” to your life’s plate of responsibilities. This New Year could be like round 7 of a great boxing match, intensely familiar, but at least you’re almost finished fighting a really good and engaging fight.

2016 could be less about what’s new and more about finishing what you started. 

I’m not trying to put a damper on the concept of HAAAA-PPY New Year! I’m more so trying to challenge you to #GetEngaged with what 2016 really means for you. Plus, how to best engage it.

Stick with me through this one.

I know this isn’t the sexiest way to think about the New Year, but think about this: Is this a yahooo-yippe, get the glitter shoes out kinda New Year because you truly sense there’s a new, incredible thing that’s on the horizon OR is this a rollup yo sleeves kinda New Year because you know your consistent persistence is needed to reap the harvest?

Before your mind wanders to, –doesn’t every “new year” come with something new?!

Yes, as humans, on this journey called life, evolution is inevitable and newness can be counted on whether we like it or not. However, I’m not referring to how life happens to us, but how we happen to life.

In my debut book, #GetEngaged with Yourself & Win! 12 Keys to Unlocking the Life & Love You Desire, I share how life kept happening to me. I lost a job, my relationship ended, all these hurtful things kept happening in order to help me shift my focus from an unintentional way of living life to a more intentional way of engaging life.

It’s day one.

How will you intentionally engage your life in 2016?

Are you going to go with the New Year’s resolutions approach? Which Amy Cuddy, a social psychologist, warns can cause more harm than good because people in general aren’t realistic about goal setting, failure is likely or are you going to do your best to #GetEngaged with a greater, more intentional plan for your life that’s rooted in God’s best for you?

The other day, I received an email from a young woman who attended the KNOW YOUR WORTH Brunch & Coaching series on 12.13.15, she wrote:

I don’t feel like I currently have a great relationship with God and I really don’t know where to begin with starting the foundation. I’m still trying to figure out my purpose and I don’t think I will be able to narrow it down until I can build and maintain my relationship with God.   ~M. Warren

When I read her email, I was like wow –she gets it!

She made a profound connection: In order to discover your purpose, God’s guidance is needed. When you decide to make a New Year’s resolution, without God, without it being connected to a larger purpose, it will probably fail for two reasons.

Most New Year’s Resolutions Fail because they lack purpose & Godly perception.

1. New Year’s resolutions without a higher purpose are difficult to sustain overtime. Basically, the why is weak? If you’re desiring to lose weight, why are you resolving to lose weight? It may sound sad, but being healthy isn’t a strong enough reason to exercise. If it were, then “more than 1/3 of U.S. adults” wouldn’t be obese.

Your New Year’s resolution doesn’t stand a chance if it’s attached to a goal that deep down inside you don’t believe in or at your core you think it doesn’t matter.

However, when your resolve to exercise, save money or go to church more is attached to a purpose greater than you, your God-given purpose, your why is strong! Your why, your purpose will fuel you to stick with it. It’s called grace. Grace is gifted by God to sufficiently support your purpose with godly resources.

“And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.” ~Philippians 4:19

  1. New Year’s resolutions that come to you without Godly perception (foresight) or discernment aren’t guaranteed to be fulfilled. Only God knows the end from the beginning. If God didn’t ordain it, it’s up to you to fulfill it.

“…yea, I have spoken it, I will also bring it to pass; I have purposed it, I will also do it.” ~Isaiah 46:11

We can plan all we want, but if our plans aren’t attached to a foreshadowing from God, then our plans and resolutions are just shots in the dark at what we “think” will give us the outcome we desire.

The other aspect of failed resolutions lies in the cause and effect relationship. You may think that if you lose weight, or reduce your debts, or exercise more, your entire life will change, and when it doesn’t, you may get discouraged and then you revert back to old behaviors.” ~Ray Williams

In 2016, you don’t have to continue shooting in the dark, wasting your emotional, physical and spiritual energy.

You can preserve all your goodness and creative juices by making more intentional resolutions, more intentional steps, by tuning into what God has purposed for you. As the young lady from the #KYWBrunch wrote:

“I’m still trying to figure out my purpose and I don’t think I will be able to narrow it down until I can build and maintain my relationship with God.”

If you’re ready to build and maintain your relationship with God, try starting with…

  • curiosity; a desire to know God for yourself and why you were intentionally created.
  • continual prayer; talking with God to gain understanding and listening for God’s response.
  • church; hearing God’s biblical story preached in practical ways to help you best navigate life.
  • community; spending time with the right people can enhance your personal and spiritual development.

I’m excited to see more women #GetEngaged in 2016. How has this article moved you? Do you prefer to make resolutions? Comment below, we’d love to hear how you plan to engage this New Year.

With Love,

Tiffy Sign 90

P.S. If this content blessed you, please share the good with your friends. It matters. 

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By | 2017-03-11T15:18:52+00:00 January 1st, 2016|blog|0 Comments

About the Author:

Are you new to TiffyTalks? My name is Tiffany. I reside in Philly, but I'm originally from Boston. I'm Deja's mom, and I enjoy my urbanista lifestyle. The #GetEngaged mission I'm on is simple: I believe when a woman gets engaged with her true self, she's more likely to make better decisions, set boundaries and take the risks that bring her closer to the desires of her heart. I'm living proof that getting engaged works! Pull up and enjoy the #GetEngaged articles and resources.

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