The Best Advice for Single Women of Faith in 2020

You're single. Matter of fact, you've been single for sometime, and you're over it. You desire to be married, but the scene out here isn't looking favorable, and when you do meet a man, his profile's bio and who he really is, isn't adding up.

On social media, you keep scrolling by dem babies, the bridal gowns and relationship goals. It's enough to make you mad.

Single Sis, what are you to do in the meantime?

"Be very patient and lean into Him."

I know. You are tired of being told to keep the faith, or better yet, being offered advice --you didn't ask for, on how to go from single to taken, but this suggestion is different. If you look really close, you'll see.

It's spiritually active and not spiritually passive.

"Be very patient and lean into Him."

Both require your spirit to rise up, and your flesh to fall back. You have to be actively engaged with yourself and God to navigate your singleness season well in today's world; to patiently wait, when you want to press the gas, to pray more, when you want to throw in the towel.  

What's your other alternative?

You could take matters into your own hands, but I'm sure you're familiar with that option. The last time you let your frustration or flesh lead you, how did that work out for you? I'm sincerely asking, how did that work out?

If you can honestly say, 'not good,' then let this testimony provide you with some new options or perhaps, confirmation.     

A few weeks ago, I received a direct message (DM) from an Instagram connect stating, "I'm getting married!!" She's a mom, pediatrician, Gen X'er, living in the south, and has asked to remain anonymous.

Her testimony confirms that taking the steps of faith to get engaged with yourself matters, and bears good fruit.

Here's her DM sent to me on October 24, 2019: 

"Sis, I wanted to share with you that I'm getting married!! My bf of 2 years proposed to me yesterday!!" November will be exactly 10 years since my divorce. I prayed, I cried, I worked on myself. I met some guys, but they weren't the one. My creative gifts grew exponentially during this single time. I had conversations with God about what I wanted in a man and He answered my prayers. 10 years after!!! I know this is your ministry and if you want, you can share my story, but anonymously please! Your posts and newsletters have really inspired and resonated with me. The love God has for us is true and so real, but we have to be very patient and lean into Him." 

Here are 5 things she did as a single woman that are worth highlighting: 

1. She prayed, cried and had conversations with God. Being vulnerable with God isn't easy, especially if you've been taught that vulnerability is a weakness, but it's where breakthroughs happen, and where your truest self is able to release and receive. Can you tell God the truth about what you desire? 
2. She worked on herself. After her divorce, she had 10 years to her advantage to grow, reflect, and GetEngaged with herself, to get prepared for the desires of her heart. How much time have you been gifted to grow, heal or develop yourself?
3. She was selective. She said, "I met some guys, but they weren't the one." Instead of being hasty, she exercised wisdom to wait for the best fit for her life. Can you tell the difference between a fit and a force?
4. She explored her creative gifts. The word explore means to examine, scrutinize or to search out. She searched out her areas of creativity AND acted on them. Being creative is innate for all human beings. Have you explored your creativity? 
5. She gave thanks (Psalm 9:1). She didn't get her blessing and ride off into the sunset. Like the woman at the well, she was blessed, then ran on and blessed others by her testimony. She said, "The love God has for us is true and so real,  but we have to be very patient and lean into Him." When God blesses you, will you go and tell others or will you keep it to yourself?
Investing in your relationship with yourself and God, will first bear good fruit in your life, like self-love, patience and self-control, AND eventually those good fruits will pour into your family, community, and future marriage.
As the good Doctor said, we have "to be patient and lean into Him." What part of her testimony spoke to you? Comment, let us know below. 

In pursuit, 

Tiffany Wilson, M.Div -@tiffytalks | Instagram

Are you committed to flowing in 2020 with ease, abundance and an openness to love? If so, I invite you to join me for a Coaching + Coffee SessionClick here for more details. 

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